The Crazy Eye and Other Stories about O' Malley

So this weekend we are coming up on the 2 year anniversary of getting our dog O'Malley. And WOW, what a ride it has been! He was about 6 months old when we got him from a couple claiming they were moving and just didn't have room for them in their new house. Our first clue should have been that he was free. Why was he free? Not because they were moving. That is for sure.

Maybe he was free because he thinks the furniture belongs to him. Our first night we went to put him to bed in his kennel and found him chilling on our couch! I have no idea where he got the idea that it was okay to be on the couch, but he did. We have finally got THAT notion out of his head and it only took Ryan throwing him off the bed a few times for him to learn that the bed was off limits too. However, he has completely claimed our love sac as his own doggie throne. We are just thankful that we no longer find doggie treats "buried" underneath the cushions of the couch.

Then again, maybe he was free because he is just so darn enthusiastic about walks. It only took 3 different leashes (including a choke collar which didn't phase him in the least. He pulled until his tongue turned blue every time we passed a house with a dog), a shock collar, many a night studying episodes of The Dog Whisperer and plenty of practice to teach Malley how to heal on walks. He still only heals for Ryan...late at night when all other dogs are in their houses...on busy streets where no other dogs reside... but, he does heal. Why even walk him you ask? Because if you don't walk him, he gets THE CRAZY EYE. Basically the crazy eye is equivalent to someone with AD/HD on speed. He gets this crazy look in his eye like he has so much energy inside of him that he might explode at any moment. And trust me. You DO NOT want to be in his path when he does explode. Have you ever seen someone slip on a banana peel? Yeah, that is what happened to me. Only, I didn't slip on a banana peel. A dog ran full speed into my legs and I went down like a ton of bricks right on the boo-tay. So, we walk the dog to avoid the crazy eye.

He might have been free because who can put a price on a dog that is such an amazing jumper? I swear that Malley is half kangaroo/half dog. He only stands about 3 feet high, but can jump our 6 foot fence. Many a time we have come home to find him tied to our front porch because he jumped the fence and the neighbors were nice enough to bring him home...not before he does some damage though! My neighbor Bonnie informed me that she had to give her young boys "the birds and the bees" talk after O' Malley jumped the fence and decided he REALLY LIKED (hint, hint) her female dog. So if anyone has wondered why we have installed those lovely fence extensions on the top of our fence, it is because we are trying to save the innocence of all children in our neighborhood...and all female dogs too. He has also jumped out of our bedroom window (which had a screen on it). The only reason he didn't jump all the way out was because I grabbed him by his hind legs and pulled him back in ... while I was on conference call for work. I have also had to hold on to his hind legs as I pulled the car over, upper body hanging over the side door's open window.

Speaking of cars, maybe he was free because they knew of the other investments we would need to make in him. We have had to invest in a doggie gate for our car because he likes to stick his whole body, not head, out the window. Unfortunately, he never figured out the buttons on the door and he routinely rolled the window up on himself, getting his head irreversibly stuck. Or they knew that we would need to invest in air conditioning repairs. (He likes to chew on the wires). Or that we would need to repair our blinds after he chewed a whole in them trying to see what was going on outside.

Or maybe he was free because he just needed someone to love that would love him right back. Malley, here's to the next two years, because the last two years have been...unforgettable! We love ya little poo.